There are so many things that I’d love to try and do.
Living in a big city, making costumes, different things I haven’t done or tried. But there was one thing that I have always wanted to do.
Create a video game.
I thought about this years ago and got overwhelmed. There is so much to making a game, even a simple one. But independent game developers have inspired me, especially Toby Fox, the creator of the 2015 game Undertale. Undertale tells an amazing story with 2D graphics that were created by one guy and an artist. I love the pixel style and the characters he created were much more than squares on the screen. It made me want to explore animation as well.
Then I get ahead of it all and psyche myself out before I even start. I start thinking I’m too dumb to learn a new program or to try something new at all. I always do that, no matter what sort of project. I even think that going to my part time job in sales, that I can’t learn fast enough and that I will totally crumble.
The thing is, that’s not true. I know it. In my head I do. In my heart, I don’t. I have a tough time with my self confidence, whether its my appearance or my mind. I’m even aware of every social interaction, over analyzing it and think I’m being weird. Everything I do is being judged by myself, and I can’t seem to turn it off. I know a lot of people are like that, and basically everyone is judgmental of themselves in some way.
I was contemplating making a game on the drive home from work one night, and thought to myself, what is the point of holding off on something you want to try just because you think its a big learning curve, or you think you will fail. I don’t have to make the next Skyrim. I can start with basics and learn on my own. I can leave room to be bad at it in the beginning, especially with something new. Do my research. The internet is a great tool for learning, I don’t have to figure it all out from scratch.
My point is, try the thing you want to try. Do research and experiment. You won’t succeed 100% of the things you don’t even start. Don’t get in the mindset of “I can’t” right away. Cause if you really work at something, you might be great at it. That being said, if you aren’t great at it, don’t sweat it. Nobody is an expert at something they just started. Give it time.
If there is something you have always wanted to try, why not do it? Ask yourself, what’s holding you back?
It might be easier than you think.
Thanks for reading.
Featured image copyright to Toby Fox, Undertale